If only...

There's been a recent letter from a birth mother to a stepmother making the rounds on the internet that I really feel the need to discuss.  More than likely you have seen it.  It's a beautiful letter and the first time I read it, it literally brought tears to my eyes.  A horrible sense of mixed emotions came with those tears as well.

Woman writes heartwarming letter to her daughter's stepmom

This letter is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard of.  If only more birth mother's and their daughter's stepmothers could have this sort of relationship.  It seems to me that it's extremely rare for a birth mother and stepmother to be able to be civil let alone this close and loving to each other.  Being on the opposite end of the spectrum, feeling nothing but burning hatred from B's birth mother, I'm both extremely frustrated that hell would freeze over before I could have anywhere near this kind of relationship with this woman but I'm also so happy to hear that other mother's can get it so right.

I can understand how difficult it must be to accept another woman into the life of your own daughter. To hear of how great she is from your daughter and to see how much your daughter loves her.  I honestly can't imagine how that must feel, so I don't blame B's mother for not liking me.  In all honesty it was something I expected to happen.  I never for a second expected for her to be nice to me or to be happy that I was involved in her daughter's life, but I did expect for her to at least attempt at being civil towards me.  Never happened.

In fact the first time I met B's mother there were no awkward introductions, no uncomfortable hellos like I had expected.  I wasn't even acknowledged.  She just walked up to my fiancé's truck, opened the back door and pulled their daughter out of the truck.  Now maybe it's just me but I was raised that you wait for people to get out of a vehicle and you don't open someone else's car door.  I was in shock.  Even then I tried to let it slide.  I knew that her and my fiancé had a rather volatile relationship but this still bothered the crap out of me!

It's all been downhill since then and there are too many stories to share in one post.  My main point for right now is that I am simply amazed by these two women from this letter.  They are epitome of grace and compassion.  Bravo to the two of you, and may you set an example for all birth and stepmothers alike to strive for!